I've
been fortunate to work with a world class publisher, Deer Hawk Publications, and an
editor for several years. They have, at times, worked me like a dog to curb
some of my more egregious writing faux pas, errors that make me appear to be a
rank amateur. I have a scheduled monthly faux pas correction edit that I
perform to ferret out these bad habits.
Number
one on my hit list is the word very. In the first manuscript that I sent
to my publisher, I admit that I used the word very 248 awful times. My writing
sounded like I had nothing concrete to say. As I've learned, my writing is greatly
improved if I delete the word very and write why the very, what the
very, or how the vary instead. Let me ask you which is more expressive, 'I
love you very much' or 'I love you deeper than the deepest sea, higher that the
highest mountain.' I do still include an occasional very in
character dialog. People use the word in every day speech. It happens. Outside
of character dialog, I limit myself to two or three very's only if the
context of the story demands them.
Only
use impressive vocabulary to express impressive concepts like emotions,
instinctive reactions, and the human feelings behind them. Don't use contrived
vocabulary to express simple concepts like he said, she said. He expounded,
she confabulated just sounds pretentious and complicates the reading
experience. It's cumbersome. Stretch your vocabulary where the stretch does
some good like expressing the million and one emotions that can be derived from
a first kiss. Simple concepts are best delivered in simple terms.
Don't
use special text formatting to try to build a scene or situation. Use words to
build a scene or situation. When I see italics, bold, underlining,
or oversized letters used to try to bring emphasis and/or impact to the written
passage all I read is the equivalent of a drum shot, snare-thunk. For me, it's
like having a stage actor look at the audience, grin and nod his head after
every punch line, snare-thunk. Let the reader extract whatever emphasis best
fits the readers interpretation of the words. The writer should concentrate on
presenting the best words to elicit reader involvement.
Here'
one of my hard earned pet peeves. Adjectives and adverbs blunt creative
writing. I have overused both. I now realize that the statement that adverbs
are the simple instrument of the weak mind is true. Instead of using an adverb,
write out what adverb was meant to convey. For instance, don't say, 'He
crept quietly into the room,' say, 'He crept into the room.' Then write two
paragraphs describing how he crept into the room. Use the active description to
further develop the characters. 'He put his toes down first and then rolled
onto his heel like he learned while in the military.' Or, 'He moved his hands
in slow motion, not wanting his old joints to creak.' The best example of
adjective substitution that I've ever read came from the E.L Irwin novel Lost
and Found. The female lead 'noticed his hands.' The female lead did not,
'notice his manly hands.' Irwin wrote two or three paragraphs about his hands
and introduced insights into their background and character in the process.
Search 'ly[blank]' and see how much more effectively you can write the what or
why behind the adverb or adjective.
When editing, I have a basic, but absolute rule, KISS, 'keep it simple,
stupid.' There's no other single writing flaw that will lose my interest faster
that a long, complicated, flowery sentence with six thoughts, four subjects,
five verbs that takes eleven breaths to read it because the writer doesn't KISS
before I buy the book and start to read because reading is my passion, etc.,
etc. Some new authors equate long complicated sentence structure with advance
writing style. Bosh. True, I'm a thriller and action writer. Short, clipped
sentences work for tense, action scenes. But, I think all writers would benefit
from a good KISS. So, unless an author is the new Emily Bronte, complicated
sentences only frustrate readers.
Mindful
of the KISS principle, keep character names simple and topical. Using
pretentious character names will be my last rant. I am usually put off by
pretentious names that I have to take a break from the reading to try to
pronounce. Go on Google and search for the common names indicative of the time
period and region of the story. Pick easy names from the list. Or, as I
have done on occasion, open your ancestry files and pick names from your
ancestors. Either way, keep it simple. Now I did use a two line long Greek name
for one of my recurring characters in The
Defect. However,
after I shocked the reader with this incomprehensible name, I introduced the
nickname that he answers to DAX. I wanted the reader to be so happy to see the
three letter name that they would not forget where it came from. And, no I
won't take the time to type it out. I don't want to have to try to read it or
pronounce again, either.
Six
simple rules. They seem easy don't they. Trust me they're not. But I do scan
for these writing errors in my current project at least once a month. But,
that's just me.
My name is Jeff Bailey.
I write nuclear thrillers for a reason, I’ve worked in nuclear related
industries, from nuclear weapons to nuclear research, for fifty years. Deer Hawk Publications released my
first book, The
Defect in June of 2016. In The
Defect, I tell the story of a terrorist attack on a nuclear
power plant and why the government covered it up. The
Defect is based on true events. Deer Hawk Publications is scheduled
to release I’m
a Marine in May of 2017. I’m
a Marine is about a female aviation firefighter in the U.S. Marines who
witnesses the murder of two M.P.s. She decides that it is her duty to stop
them. Keep in mind that I write nuclear thrillers. The
Chilcoat Project, to be released in spring of 2018, is about the theft
of nuclear weapons secrets from a national laboratory. The
Chilcoat Project is also based on true events. My current project, Wine
Country, is based on the true story of the Radioactive Boy Scout, but
with a more sinister twist.
Welcome to my World
